Everything I am, I borrowed
Few entries from march'25
3/3/25
In the auto, I thought — fuck, I’m supposed to be doing this. What an absolute gift it is to learn business from my parents, to work in such close proximity with my sister, to have them available for me, every day. I am so lucky to be doing life this way.
And yet I already know life is about to change. It’s shifting; I can feel the rhythm of my days changing. Still, right now, I’m here with my people, and they are more here for me than they’ve ever been. Or maybe they’ve always been, but today, I feel them with me too. I can hold this gratitude and still acknowledge my hunger for more.
I want more from my day. I want to do more. Be more. And yet, so many days, in this helter-skelter thinking, I end up being nowhere at all, or everywhere, half-heartedly. Like I’m constantly skipping and hopping from one leg to the other, but never landing on both feet.
It’s exhausting. And then I want none of it. & then I wake up & want again.
7/3/25
My personality is a collection of all the people I’ve loved—whether they’re still in my life or not. My taste in music. The clothes I like. The food and drinks I order at a restaurant. None of it is entirely my own. I’ve borrowed, adopted—copied, if I’m being honest. But copying isn’t a crime. It’s not plagiarism. It’s inheritance. And I give credit all the time.
Love for flowers, guacamole, and margaritas in the swimming pool? My mom.
A deep attachment to Indian Ocean’s music, meditation, spirituality, and the discipline of fitness? My ex-boyfriend.
The instinct to give? My mother-in-law.
Knowing when to say sorry? My fiancé.
The drive to dream bigger? Rasalica.
Patience? My masi.
How to turn two bucks into two hundred? My dad.
Being there for people, no matter what? My grandmother.
I am all of them, carried forward in a thousand little ways.
Do you ever catch yourself saying or doing something and realize it’s not entirely your own — that it belongs to someone you love?
I’ll write to you next Wednesday!
Love,
Mo 🧡
Mohika, the gratitude in your writing really stood out. You have shared your heart so openly and it’s clear how deeply you value the people in your life. It’s honest, thoughtful and grounding to read. Thank you for putting this into words. I am really proud of you!🌻
You're a beautiful young woman with a beautiful soul and life is yours to live,this life on this earth,which is not the ONLY LIFE or THE ONLY PLACE but I only sense that dimly. Of course. Enjoy the loveliness within and without you. By doing that you are reflecting and sharing it with us. So thank you