Can you be friends with someone & not know their name?

Hell, why not?

this post is about leaves

This city, this building, it’s full of people I don’t know. People I pass every day as if they’re painted on walls.

That’s where I’ve landed with my 78-year-old neighbor. No names, no life stories, just this unspoken barter system we’ve created, passing little pieces of our days back and forth. We’re two planets in orbit.

She’s got hair that barely covers 20 percent of her head. Dyed with mehndi leaves so it stains her scalp a rich, burnt orange. It’s a winter sunset. And she wears it with pride. She’s a woman of few words, her gaze is direct and sharp, but never unkind.

Yesterday, I brought her a handful of basil stalks because my pots on the balcony have practically exploded with basil leaves. Figured it was high time to prune and share the bounty! I snipped a handful, took it over to her door. I didn’t knock. Entered her home and found her knitting on the sofa. I didn’t know she knits! Not to brag but I will. My to-be mother in law is the best knitter I know.

Anyway, I offered her the leaves with a sheepish grin. In hindi I muttered, “आपके लिए है” (re: these are for you). She dropped the wool and received them joyously.

Today, she called out to me from her balcony, asking if I could open my door. We met in the lobby, and there she was, holding out two slices of my absolute favorite chocolate cake. She told me it was her granddaughter’s birthday. There was a flicker in her eyes, a softness that hinted she’d planned this, knew just how much I’d appreciate it.

As I was writing in my journal it occurred to me I don’t know her name. And she doesn’t know mine!

Is there someone in your life who’s more of a silent friend, but still shares beautiful moments with you? Share your story in the comments!

A short note on Basil

It’s my favorite pot herb. Year-round its leaves yawn & roll open like flags. I run my fingers over its delicate stems. The beauty of basil lies not just in its taste, but in its ability to ground us. Well, any plant will ground us if we let it. But basil is queen.

I also love dill, rosemary, & thyme.

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