At the end of the day what matters most is how you feel about yourself.

keeping the heart open & finding light again

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When you wake up feeling lost, without any excitement or joy in your heart. When you just can't seem to get into the swing of things, and you've given up on making plans or hoping for anything better. When every day feels the same, and you're stuck in this storm of emotions, with no way out in sight. Where do you find that spark you've lost? How do you start enjoying life again, letting it wash over you like it used to?

And what about those days when everything feels empty? Don't push them away. Hold onto them gently, like little reminders of where you've been. Someday, they'll become part of your story, something you can look back on and appreciate. Someday, the sun won't feel so heavy, and you'll find your rhythm again. You don't have to have all the answers right now. Just trust that someday, things will start to make sense again.

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It's about knowing that I've taken the time to nurture my well-being, to show myself love and compassion. Because when I take care of myself, I'm better able to show up for the people and things that are important to me.

Finding balance between giving and receiving, between doing things for others and doing things for myself. And it's about recognizing that self-care isn't selfish; it's necessary. How can I be there for others if I'm not taking care of myself first?

There's a powerful story I once heard about a traveler in search of the Fountain of Youth. For years, he journeyed far and wide, facing countless challenges in his quest for eternal youth. Yet, despite his efforts, the elusive fountain always seemed just out of reach. It wasn't until the traveler returned home, weary from his adventures, that he discovered the true source of everlasting youth: self-care. By nurturing himself; body, mind, and spirit; he found the key to unlocking a life of vitality and joy.

At the end of the day, what matters most is not the wealth or fame we accumulate, but the love and kindness we show ourselves. Just like tending to a delicate garden, self-care requires patience and perseverance. Despite the weeds of doubt and self-criticism, nurturing ourselves creates peace within.

lovely photo by @squishsupport on Instagram

Knowing when to stop isolating

I lived my entire childhood being part of a huge group. Playing hide & seek in the bushes, cycling in groups of fives or tens, & being a noisy troop of monkeys in the jungle gym at the park behind my home. Always excited to be out & stay out. I remember wolfing lunch after school, finishing my homework at the speed of light, and running out the giant metal door to meet my friends. We were in different schools, belonged to completely different families, & definitely had different accents. But we were a unit. And nobody disrespected anyone. In fact, the bigger the group got, the happier we would be. There were no under currents of favouritism or mean girls. In fact, the boys were gentle, soft, & strong. I learnt long jumps and tried my hand at basket ball.

But then we moved. My sister and I. Into a bigger home. A better one, cosmetically & environmentally. We got admission into a school far superior to the one I used to go to - and although everything looked picture perfect on paper, something in me shifted. I shut down. Socially. Emotionally. Maybe it was the shock of entering 11th grade mid-term and knowing no one. Or finally going through my first true heartbreak. Or missing my grand parents so much my heart stopped beating. I was so desperate to fit in. To be part of something. Immediately & all at once. & life just wasn't giving it to me. I was the pity party. You could practically spot a rainy cloud over my head if I stood in-front of you. A boiling pot of unresolved emotions & low self-esteem.

I wasn't so fluent in the English language. Grew up thinking & communicating in Hindi. Never even imagined English - a universal subject you learn in school & read books in could be a defining factor for friendships. How you climb the social ladder. Naturally, I was a small fish in a big big pond I called my high-school. Desperate for company. For acceptance.

I forgot how good it feels to laugh until my stomach hurts. And it messed with how I got along with others. I was stuck and couldn't do anything about it.

I know now that I needed to allow myself time. To adjust. To understand. Needed to allow change to seep into my skin like a smooth water-based serum that works its magic from the inside. I didn't know that with time I will find friends. Not just superficial ones, but in fact people to whom I can bare my soul & dance naked, carefree. & eventually through Facebook & landlines be able to stay in touch with old ones. Time sorts everything. My rusty social skills would once again thrive. There's no need to rush. No need to hurry.

It's a snake eating it's own tail kind of situation. You're lonely so you isolate. You're isolating so you're lonely.

Today, I feel so accomplished after having a good evening of socializing with humans. I feel like I did something so good for myself and now I can enjoy my time knowing I'm not isolating. Or running away from company. My blissful bubble of solitude is only to let me heal & nurture my spirit. It's not because I'm sad or I don't enjoy the company around me. I'm learning to skillfully balance time so I can get all the benefits of hugs & conversations alongside my sacred self-care rituals.

Please feel free to share parts of this newsletter that connect with you on social media or send to someone you love. You sharing my words helps my work reach more people! It’s a beautiful thing to put yourself out there even if you don’t feel inspired in the moment. Thank you for reading this. I will continue to keep my heart open.

Nature is brimming with poetry, if you just take the time to listen. This 9-page guide offers everything you need to dive into the beauty of nature with a poet’s eye. From choosing the right location to engaging all five senses, this guide will help you unlock the writing potential hidden in leaves, birdsongs, and morning dew. Bonus resources included for even more inspiration!

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